What to do if the husband offends?

Unfortunately, in some families there is a man’s violence against a woman. This happens primarily because one side allows you to mock yourself, and the other side, having a rude character, uses it. A man who insults and humiliates a woman is sickening among normal people.

It happens that events develop as follows: before the wedding he gave flowers, and after the wedding he began to be rude and often insult. Further more. The woman went on maternity leave and became financially dependent on her husband. If the representative of the stronger sex has the psychology and character of a tyrant, then he will begin to show his importance in every way: to make trouble, speak arrogantly and in an orderly tone with his pregnant wife. If a woman objects, then threats and insults will follow.

Well, if a woman has where to go and get help there. However, there are hopeless situations. But you can always find a way out. It is necessary to understand the reasons for the inappropriate behavior of the husband and the options that caused this behavior. And there may be several.

The very first reason is a tyrant husband. It is possible that such a psycho and before the wedding behaved with his future wife is not quite chivalrous. For example, could easily push out of the car in a fit of anger or publicly insult. Only a strong feeling of love often overshadows the eyes of a girl. And many do not want to notice the flaws in the nature of his chosen one. And the result is a miserable life after marriage.

In another case, the man is a real Don Juan. Such a marriage is quickly bored after the wedding. Pregnancy of the wife does not care at all, but even hinders. He wants new sensations, and he is always looking for them. Intrigue on the side will cause discord in the family. Insults will follow. A woman is left either to put up with such a situation, or to part with the wrong husband.

It also happens that the couple lived in marriage for a long time. His husband's feelings got a little cold, and he felt like a "master of life." For example, children grow up in a family, the wife is busy with household chores and does not have the opportunity to earn a lot. The husband is in the family the main earner. If such a man has egocentric character traits, then sooner or later they will appear. The husband will begin to treat his wife with contempt, in every way humiliate and insult. Get away from this and children.

A woman is afraid of losing her husband, because she loves him very much, or she simply has nowhere to go. In this case, elementary jealousy is included. On this basis, the wife begins to suspect her faithful of adultery. He checks his pockets, phone, asks unnecessary questions. Over time, this behavior leads to conflict. The result is scandals.

Another cause of violence may be the feeling of inferiority developed by a man over the years. Such a flaw will promote self-affirmation at the expense of bullying the spouse. A difficult case that will gain momentum if a woman does not offer active resistance.

Another reason is the relationship on the side. A man is torn into two parts, and considers his legitimate spouse guilty of this. Divorce will be followed by division of property. Many do not want and fear. They relieve nervous overloads by humiliating and insulting their wife.

The first law of psychology says that a psychologist should not give specific advice, much less demand that you follow them. A good specialist should only direct a person to the correct solution of the problem through reasoning and conclusions, which the same person should draw himself.

If the husband offends, it also happens that it is often drunk, then it is necessary to fight this phenomenon. Otherwise, you are morally tired and can seriously get sick physically. Constantly enduring tyranny and resentment is impossible. Therefore, you need to make a choice: leave your husband or drive him out of the house (if there is such a legal opportunity) or remain married to him and begin to correct the situation together. Which of these methods is right for you, decide for yourself.

In the first two cases it is more or less clear what to do next. But if you can not part with her husband, then start the fight for your happiness and family. This will mean that your situation is not as critical as it seems at first glance. The following tips may help you.

Your husband insults you, finds fault with you over trifles and small things, constantly brings you to tears. The situation is not very pleasant, but fixable. First try to ignore his provocations. Do not cry and do not be offended. Treat it with indifference.

If he continues his actions, then turn to him, look him in the eyes and ask what this behavior is caused by. Just do it without hysteria. In a calm tone, explain how it hurts you to hear unfounded accusations, give examples and arguments. Say that your patience will soon "burst," and then you will have to part forever. Remind him of the children who are suffering too. It is possible that your husband does not always think about what he says, and such actions will bring him to his senses.

If the spouse offends you, do not repeat after him. Try to cry or make a very offended look. Sit in the corner and sit silently. His ardor will soon run out, and he will calm down.

Try to leave the family. Take the children and live temporarily with their parents. If the husband comes for you, then do not immediately open the door. Tell him that you no longer want to see him if he does not change his attitude towards you.

Comes another time, connect your relatives to the conversation. Let them say that they will no longer be allowed to mock you. The husband must feel that you are not alone: ​​you have protection and there is where to go.

The next problem is when the husband criticizes the figure and appearance of his wife, comparing with other women. She says that she is not a very good housewife, besides she has a not very pleasant appearance in comparison with the appearance of her neighbor. Such an attitude causes tension in the family. It is exacerbated when the spouse makes comments about one or another of the actions of the spouse.

This may mean that your spouse has a little cold feeling to you. They need to refresh. It is enough to cause a slight jealousy. Show your chosen one that you may like other men. At the root, change your appearance. Repaint the hair, make a trendy hairstyle, manicure, buy a few modern outfits. “Give” a bouquet to yourself (just so that your husband does not know this) and bring it home. Answer all questions evasively and coyly. You will see for yourself that the attitude of the husband towards you will change drastically.

It happens in life that a husband calls his wife in bad words, often does so with children. You feel how he treats you disrespectfully even when strangers are near. It spoils the mood.In this case, you need to fight and be sure to demand proper attitude towards yourself.

To get started, tidy yourself up (do everyday make-up, hairstyle), pull yourself up morally and physically. Do not allow yourself to behave the way very scandalous women behave. All the time, speak correctly and culturally with children and people. It is desirable that while always was your husband.

When the spouse has a good mood, tell him that you are a beautiful couple and you want it to be like this forever. Ask your husband not to act indecently with you anymore. For an exemplary family, this is unacceptable. If your husband is a good person and just did not think about such questions before, he will surely respond to your call, and everything will work out for you.

It also happens that your husband blames you for everything and all the time. In which you are not guilty: not in the right way, raising children, because of your wrong behavior, you experience various troubles and so on. Everyone should understand that it is not good to shift all the responsibility on the shoulders of loved ones, especially on a woman.

In such cases, do not get lost and sincerely believe that you are doing something wrong all the time. First, believe in your strength, instill confidence in yourself. Do not make excuses if the husband once again starts to reproach you. Quietly and without hysteria, ask him: “What would you do in this situation?” He will answer this question for you. And you tell me that now you will consult with him all the time before you do anything. And next time, consult with him, even for trifles. Do this and when he is busy with something. Let him get tired of it. As a result, the husband himself will make many mistakes. He will begin to understand that he was wrong.

Difficult situation, and any normal person will advise to run away from him as far as possible. However, the specialist must first understand why this is happening. Cases are different. People on Earth live a lot, and their characters are different. Definitely, a self-respecting man, with a healthy psyche and morally stable disposition, will never raise a hand against a woman, even if such a bring to the "white heat". In the worst case, he will spread all the furniture and even the house, but he will not touch the representative of the weaker sex with his finger.

By the way, in some cases, the woman herself provokes an unrestrained and not quite well-bred representative of the stronger sex to assault. She first begins to insult and humiliate the man. It can even raise a hand and hit the cheek. It is quite possible that in this case she will receive change.

Such women can be recommended every time with all their strength to restrain themselves, if you really want to quarrel and express their point of view. To do this, inhale and exhale before taking any action. Then look around. Perhaps close to you are close people and even children. Look at yourself from their eyes.

Become feminine and weak. If you are very offended, then weep and go to another room. A man is by nature called to protect the second half. He will definitely want to pity you. And when he does, calmly explain to him what he is wrong, and express the insult. Quarrels and assault in your family will cease.

More difficult case when you got a husband with an inadequate and aggressive character. Here you need to think carefully before making any decision. Any excuses for him will be inappropriate if he beats you systematically.

It also happens that a woman is very dependent on her tormentor husband. And she has no one to ask for help. No relatives, or they do not want to help. You should not tolerate beatings, but you need to contact the crisis center. They will help you with housing, support you morally and financially, until you become independent.

To do this, stop forgiving your husband. Act according to the letter of the law, the essence of which is that any violence and torture of a person is unacceptable. For non-compliance with the law will be punished. It can occur if you seek help from the relevant authorities.

No need to forgive, but need to give a strong rebuff. With all your character to show that such attacks with you will not pass without a trace. Psychologists have noted the fact that some tyrants, husbands, went from their wives to other women.

In the new family, they became docile and radically changed their behavior towards the new spouse. It turned out that the second wife initially made it clear that she would not allow her chosen one to mock herself. From this it follows that an inadequate husband can be reinserted if it is time to make it clear that you are “not a whipping doll.

The collapse of the family and divorce - this does not mean that the former spouses will never meet again. Many couples remain living together on the same living space, since they have nowhere to go, and there is no possibility to parting.

This is where the problems begin. Former spouse can come home drunk and start his bullying. In this case, he forgets that you have become almost strangers. Thus, the "former" is trying to take over power again.

You can ask for help from special services to keep order. At the same time try to divide your living space and embed locks in your half of the apartment. Such a measure psychologically separates your ex-husband from you.

Do not respond to insults and humiliation. Pretend that this person simply does not exist for you. Meet another man. Perhaps his appearance in your life will turn the situation around. The former husband will understand that everything has changed radically and will cease to show interest to you, and at the same time insults will disappear.

There are cases when former spouses went to divorce unconsciously. Both still have feelings that they felt for each other over the years. Perhaps your spouse is trying to reconcile with you. Only does it ineptly, exactly as a schoolboy would do, jerking his classmate by a pigtail.

Do not judge him strictly. Think about the fact that you should build relationships. If you have children growing up, the re-creation of marriage will be the natural end of your family drama. Make a decision and talk to your husband about it. In this situation, he will accept your offer with pleasure, and as a result you will become happy again.

A relationship crisis is not the final verdict. You can still fix it if there is a great desire. However, remember that your husband should also want to correct the situation. Otherwise, the following tips perform just pointless. To divorce did not take place, then begin to act on points.

• You are not divorced, and you still have a romantic relationship. Try at this moment to remind your husband about your meetings, about your love. How did you meet, how was your wedding and so on. Perhaps this will stir up new feelings in your spouse, and he will cease to behave inadequately.
• Call your husband to the movies for a walk. On the way, remember how happy you were. Tell your spouse what is happening in your soul, how hard it is to endure such humiliation and insults from your loved one. Give an example of the phrases that your spouse utters when he tries to humiliate you. Perhaps, being in such a good mood, he will look at himself from the outside and he will be ashamed of his behavior.
• It is better not to use the help of friends, but if there is no other way, ask them to talk to your husband.Have someone tell your spouse from the outside that he is doing wrong to you.
• Remind your spouse that children grow up in your family, and his aggressive behavior is simply unacceptable in this situation.