Wedding traditions and customs in Russia

Russian wedding is an interesting symbiosis of old national traditions, trends of the Soviet era and elements of Western style. Although many couples prefer to celebrate the wedding in a Western manner (exit registration, replacement of the toastmaster by the leader, lack of contests, harmonist, traditional ransom, and meeting with bread and salt), most of the marryers follow classical traditions.

In ancient times, before sending matchmakers to the house to the bride, they were carefully selected. As a rule, relatives became relatives. The main purpose of the matchmaker is to be an authoritative person in the eyes of others and to know what to say in a given situation. The peculiarities of weddings in Russia were that the bride was not familiar with the future spouse before the wedding, and it depended on the skill of the matchmakers whether the wedding would take place at all.

As part of the matchmaking, many symbolic rituals were performed, some of which are observed today.

This attribute most often brought matchmakers from the groom. If the girl agreed to the wedding, she cut the loaf into pieces and distributed to all those present, starting with the parents. Loaf needed to eat until the last piece - then the future marriage was considered successful and happy.

This attribute was used to dress up the matchmakers, if the girl agreed to the wedding. The matchmakers presented the towel as a gift from the bride's parents to the groom's parents.

There were certain dates and even days when the outcome of matchmaking could have ended most successfully. These numbers were the 3rd, 5th, 7th and 9th of each month, as well as October 14th. The last date was especially significant, since it was the feast of the Protection of the Most Holy Theotokos. It was impossible to wake up on the 13th of any month. Among the days of the week, weekends, Tuesdays and Thursdays were best for matchmaking.

Matchmakers, having got into the house of the future bride, never openly stated the purpose of their visit. They talked to the owners of the house on abstract topics, and then came from the distance to the point. Parents of the bride received guests cordially, were treated to drinks (they were served by the future bride).

At this time, matchmakers were looking at the girl, began to inquire about her and extol the groom. If the groom received a refusal, then, as a rule, it was a very concise answer: “Our apple was not poured yet”, “Our goods are not for sale”, “The dowry has not yet been sufficiently saved” and others.

If the results of matchmaking were positive, then after discussing organizational issues, the bride gave a betrayed handbag - a handkerchief.

Today, lovers make the decision about the wedding themselves. Only after that parents and other relatives will learn about the upcoming event. Of course, matchmaking in many families is held to this day (as a certain tribute to ancient traditions, parents). It is during this pre-wedding ceremony that the bride’s parents can better see and recognize the bridegroom.

Today matchmaking is carried out in a simplified form. Matchmakers are not satisfied with theatrical performances, they sing little and do not say jokes. The bridegroom, entering the house of the bride, presents flowers to all the women present. Matchmakers bring fruit, alcoholic beverages, sweets. The bride receives a valuable gift from the groom and the future father-in-law and mother-in-law.

Most often it is a piece of jewelry, but maybe an old family heirloom. The bride's parents are presented with an inexpensive gift, but with a meaning: a horseshoe (charm for living), a beautiful candle (for comfort and warmth in the house), a photo album (for good memories) and others. As soon as there was an exchange of gifts and mutual greetings, all those present are invited to the table, where there is a discussion of the details of the future wedding.

The groom who came along with the matchmakers must remain silent. Elocution should shine exactly matchmakers. After greeting all those present and informing about the purpose of the visit, the matchmakers can come up with an entire kaleidoscope of comic trials and tricky questions for the bride. The same tasks, carefully prepared by the relatives of the bride, are waiting for the groom.

A special place in the middle of matchmaking with characteristic jokes is the moment of offering hands and hearts. At that moment, both the bridegroom and the parents of the bride must be very serious, but sincere. The parents may ask the parents to give the daughter to him at the very beginning of the meeting or at the table.

After the engagement was announced to everyone, the main wedding efforts began. The bride, along with household chores, had to prepare herself a dowry and sew a wedding dress. In deaf villages, there was even a custom to go out every day on the porch of his paternal home, to sob and lament about the fear of entering a new life. Nowadays, this ritual is no longer observed.

In addition, on the eve of the wedding was held hen party. Today in Russia the bachelorette party is celebrated very lushly and loudly, in the old days it was a fairly quiet evening with sad songs.

It was believed that in this way the bride says goodbye to her former unmarried life. The bride herself cried and lamented. The tapes of the bride's braid were considered endowed with meaning: the girlfriends took them apart and kept them happy and soon marriage.

Pre-wedding preparation by the groom was to bake a huge painted loaf, decorated with flowers, figurines and interesting patterns of dough. The entire female half of the house under the loafing songs was engaged in the creation of this culinary masterpiece before dawn. The groom on the eve of the wedding held a bachelor party. Present at this evening, his relatives and friends.

In Russia, the ransom of the bride was a very important matter, demanding considerable generosity from the groom. Today, the monetary component has faded into the background. The main purpose of the ransom today: passing all the tests, competitions prepared by the bridesmaids, the groom proves to everyone how well he knows and loves his future spouse. Friends from the groom can always come to his aid, if necessary.

The wedding gets a new shade after the official ceremony at the registry office. Many modern couples delight themselves and guests in the hall for official ceremonies not only with the first kiss, but also with the first dance (a preliminary arrangement is required to agree on a specific composition).

After the official part of the guests waiting for a photo session with the young. Then the guests of the holiday should stand on both sides of the exit from the registry office in order to shower the young with rose petals, rice, coins or sweets.

According to folk signs, this rite (depending on the products chosen) gives young people wealth, healthy offspring, romantic and sweet life together. If the newlyweds are truly believers, then according to the customs of the Russian people on the same day, they undergo a wedding ceremony.

After the official events, holiday celebrations begin. Usually they are involved only the closest friends.

The groom carrying the bride across the bridge is also an inalienable tradition of Russian weddings. According to legends, young people should do the same procedure on seven bridges, then their union will be strong. But in the conditions of modern celebrations and busy main urban highways, this is not always possible, therefore the tradition is observed, but the number of objects is reduced to one. There is also left a memorial castle with the initials of the young as a symbol of the fortress of marriage.

In Russia, the newlyweds after the marriage attended the groom's father's house. The mother-in-law met them with bread and salt (loaf), while her father-in-law was holding icons at that time. The bride and groom had to bite off a piece of loaf. The size of the bitten off piece was determined by the head of the family. Simultaneously, the rite of blessing the new family. Today, the meeting with the loaf is increasingly held in the banquet hall in the presence of guests.

The first thing at the wedding always pay attention to the dress of the bride. Its color is, in most cases, white. The bride gets a new dress, although some girls prefer to wear her mother's dress on a solemn day, wanting to inherit her happy family life. A new dress is a symbol of entry into a new life, and white is a symbol of youth and purity. That is why women who marry several times, wear blue or beige outfits at subsequent ceremonies.

Red color today is the lot of bold and extraordinary personalities. A veil on modern weddings has become optional. She is perceived as a decoration hairstyle. Replace the veil can be a hat with a veil.

According to beliefs, there must be something old in the vestments of the bride. Most often it is a family decoration or an element from the mother's wedding dress. This attribute is a symbol of intergenerational communication. Also in the dress must be present detail, borrowed from a girlfriend. It is believed that then next to the young will always be true friends who are ready to help in a difficult moment.

The wedding scenario is designed in such a way that congratulations take the main place in it. Parents are always the first to be invited. Then the word is given to relatives and friends. In order for the money envelopes not to form a disorderly pile, and by the end of the evening and not be lost at all, the bride herself or her friends specially made a casket with a slot. The witness helps the bride to collect presents in monetary terms on the day of the celebration.

After the first toasts and snacks guests are invited to the dance floor. By tradition, the first dance is always for the young (if it was not in the registry office). It is very fashionable to do staging dances today, for which the bride and groom have been engaged in a dance studio for several months. For the spectacular performance of the bride and groom can put on other outfits for a while.

When wedding celebrations come to an end the toastmaster announces the need to transfer the family hearth from parents to children. This rite is conducted as follows:

• candles are distributed to all present;
• all go to the middle of the room, stand in a circle and light candles;
• the light in the room is extinguished;
• the background sounds quiet slow music, during which the toastmaster talks about the significance of this tradition;
• parents of young people on both sides light their candles and go out into the center of the room, becoming close to their children, light the hearth for a new family from their candles.

At the end of the wedding, the mother of the bride or newly-made mother-in-law helps the girl to take off her veil. At first she must resist this, but after persuasion she must agree. After that, the young husband unravels the spit's wife. The master of ceremonies at this time tells the story of this custom.

In the old days, the most common wedding gifts were:

• animals (cow, horse, piglet, chicken, duck);
• a set of towels without fringe;
• whip.

They all had a symbolic meaning. Animals symbolized the appearance of healthy babies, towels - a smooth life, whip - the primacy of the husband in the family.

Today, it is customary to donate money, dishes, computer and home appliances, bedding, cutlery, audio and video equipment to the wedding.

Very rarely is a Russian wedding celebrated one day. As a rule, the day following the celebration implies an informal setting. The second day is celebrated in the lap of nature - with kebabs, strong drinks, songs. And on the third day, the couple can go on a honeymoon to some hot exotic country.

About Russian wedding traditions, see the video below.