To date, such a rite as a wedding, gaining popularity again. Getting crowned has become a fashionable trend, but few couples are aware of the full responsibility of this church ordinance. A wedding is a church rite, the union of spouses by God. Since this is not only a beautiful ritual, but also a responsibility before each other and in the face of the church, it is useful to know some of its subtleties and nuances.
Who can and can not get married?
The tradition of marriage in the church originates from antiquity. Previously, only a marriage that was concluded in the temple of God was considered legal, because in olden times it was very reverent about compliance with all the rules. Many traditions are obsolete, and are no longer used, but most of them have come down to us.
All couples can get married in a church where the bride is 16 years old and the groom is 18. Of course, that a girl who has not reached the age of majority can perform this sacrament only with the permission of her parents. In order for the couple to get married, you also need to provide a marriage certificate. This requirement is that for family life you need to mature spiritually. In addition, the certificate becomes a kind of guarantee that none of the newlyweds is not in another marriage on the side.
The deadline when a couple can enter into a church marriage is 60 years for a woman, and 70 for a man. This is due to the termination of the function of procreation. Nevertheless, today many clergymen are going to meet, and crowned couples over that age. At the same time, the prayer for childbirth is omitted.
If in old times there were marriages where the bridegroom is twice or more older than the bride, then today, if the couple has a significant difference in age, the priest may try to dissuade the couple from the rash step. However, with the confidence of the couple in their feelings, the refusal of the church will not follow.
In addition, couples who decide to get married should be in the same religion, baptized, and wear a cross.
Couples can be married on the wedding day, and after an indefinite length of time after it. The main thing that the mystery took place. At the wedding you need to register in advance, for a month or two weeks. It is recommended to specify all the details with the clergyman, prepare the necessary attributes, learn the rules of conduct in the temple.
There is no significant difference between big beautiful temples and small churches. Everywhere the rite is the same. Today it is a paid sacrament, and it is better to agree on its value in advance.
Unfortunately, there are several prohibitions on the wedding, so not everyone will be able to perform this sacrament. The church will refuse:
- couples who are currently divorced or in a civil marriage;
- ecclesiastical persons who wish to conduct the ceremony after the entry into the rank;
- couples who already had the pleasure to get married three times;
- young people, if they are not baptized or have a different religion;
- couples who are related to the fourth generation.
Is it possible to have a wedding without registering a marriage?
As it is known, in ancient times there was no place for a civil marriage, but only a union consecrated by the church was recognized. Today, many couples have a question about whether it is possible to get married, bypassing the registration of a marriage in the registry office. In the modern world, the church considers marriage certificate to be the initial form of creating a family.Of course, these canons were recommended by the state, but the church does not seek to abandon them.
It is worth noting that if you ask a priest to marry you without a marriage registration document, you will most likely be refused. There are only a few exceptions to the rules permitting the wedding without registration, but only for a good reason, and with the permission of the bishop. These cases are very rare.
For example, in a church without a document, religious parishioners whom the clergyman has known for many years and is confident in their feelings may marry.
Thus, he assumes responsibility. Also, the church can make concessions to religious couples, where one of the partners is in danger or illness.
On which days is the sacrament better?
Turning to the Orthodox calendar, one can see that the days most favorable for this sacrament will last throughout the autumn: 14 days in September, 17 in October and 15 in November. In December, couples will not be able to get married, as this time falls on the Advent.
In no case should the ceremony be held on September 11 and 27 in any year. And in October it is better to get married after the 14th. The good days of September for such a sacrament will be 2, 3, 5, 7, 9, 12, 14, 16, 17, 19, 23, 24, 28, 30 numbers. And favorable days of October are 1, 3, 13, 21,22, 25, 29, 31.
Even in the old days it was customary to enter into a church marriage in the spring or autumn. The number of favorable days in this period is preserved in modern times. The most successful time for the sacrament is considered to be the period from Baptism to Shrovetide.
The best days for the ceremony are:
- Sunday;
- Monday;
- Wednesday;
- Friday.
Most of all who want to get married in church after the wedding falls on Sunday. This is due to the fact that Saturday is the best day to register a marriage, and on the second day of the wedding, that is, on Sunday, it’s time for the wedding. And the emotional load for a couple is less, and the guests are all in place. It is possible to get married on such days only if the Sunday you have chosen does not fall on a significant church holiday.
How to prepare?
Wedding must necessarily be held only in the temple, in any case, not in nature or in the monastery. Negotiate the wedding time should be the newlyweds or their parents. At the same time, it is prohibited to attract unmarried men and unmarried women to the organization of the sacrament.
It is desirable that the ceremony was conducted only for one pair, and not for several at a time. It will be very good if the bells sound after the sacrament. This is not only a beautiful tradition, it is believed that the bell ringing brings happiness in family life.
For couples who want to get married, the question arises at what time of the day to hold the ceremony: in the morning, afternoon, evening or night. At night in the temple this ritual is not carried out. The optimal time is from 13.00 to 17.00, but sometimes the church makes concessions and crowns immediately after the morning service.
After the day and time of the wedding is chosen, it is necessary to prepare for this ceremony. For this you need to stock up on a bottle of "Cahors", a small loaf, candles and towels, icons of the Savior and the Mother of God, and, of course, rings. On the photo and video should ask permission from the priest.
In the Orthodox Church, the wedding ceremony begins directly from the very betrothal. Initially, the young on the instructions of the priest carry out manipulations with the rings. Next comes the wedding ceremony itself, at which prayers are pronounced. Before the sacrament it is recommended to hold a three-day fast, and then confess.
We should not forget that the wedding is a sacrament for two, the blessing of two hearts for a long and happy life, the birth and upbringing of children according to the canons of the Orthodox religion. Therefore, you should not put this event on display of excessive pomp and luxury, as well as a large number of guests. As they say, happiness loves silence.
No matter how much the bride and the wedding party invited want to look stylish, we must not forget about modesty and repentance in the church. Therefore, to behave and dress appropriately.
There should not be short dresses, deep cleavage, jeans, high heels.
Superstitions and Signs
It will be useful to consider some signs and superstitions that are associated with the wedding ceremony. These superstitions have come down to us from ancient times, and believe in them or not, each couple decides on their own.
If you trust the old rumors, then May is considered the most inappropriate month for this sacrament. The word “May” is compared to the meaning of “toil”. That is, based on belief, all couples who entered into marriage in May, will toil all their lives.
In a leap year, only a few couples decide to get married. Such a year is considered unsuccessful for entering into both civil and church marriage. According to legend, all marriages that were concluded in a leap year will not be strong. Next to the leap year follows the year of the Black Widow, and then the year of the Black Widow. It was believed that in these years to enter into a marriage union is impossible. In the Orthodox Church, a wedding in a leap year was never forbidden, clergy consider all superstitions a sin.
Folk signs say that:
- if the couple makes an oath of allegiance over the rings, their union will be unbreakable;
- if after the wedding the young ones look in one mirror, then their union will also be strong;
- a bride who puts on her wedding dress before the wedding will put marriage at risk.
Previously it was believed that at the rite of the couple should bring a gold and silver ring. These were symbols of the feminine and masculine power, the sun and the moon. In this case, the bride in no case could not wear a ring on the gloves.
For the sacrament, witnesses play a very important role. These should be best friends, Orthodox Christians, people with an open mind. It is best to choose a married couple who is happily married.
The crown on the wedding ceremony should always be on the heads of those who perform the ceremony. If you remove it, then the marriage before God will be invalid. Candles that kept a young couple in prayer should be kept by them. They will become the indispensable custodians of marriage, will facilitate difficult childbirth.
People who are bound by the sacrament of the wedding, can not part, because they were joined by God. If the young part, they will never find their happiness apart.
The dissolution of a marriage sealed by the church is considered a great sin. Anyone who is a culprit in a divorce is hard to get a blessing for the next marriage. Today, the church makes concessions, produces a ceremony of debunking and blesses the next marriage. For the dissolution of the marriage by the church there must be good reasons and they need to be explained. Only in the case of weighty arguments will divorce be allowed.
Before you enter a church marriage, you need to remember that a wedding is a special sacrament, and it should be taken seriously. If the couple’s feelings are strong, then no superstition or omen will destroy it.
About when you can get married, see the next video.
